Searching in the Sarchasm

by Grandpa Loves Rhinos

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1.
Gimme, Gimme 03:40
I need a brand new wagon, new clothes that i can brag in whiskey to make me talk like Clint Eastwood and i want something sweet, caffeine and nicotine I want a golden goose and i want it right now pterodactyl, mastodon, I want that sabertooth cause I need the entire collection, triceratops, tyrannosaur oh I want it all, I want the megazord give me, give me, gimme, gimme, gimme everything I need something to make me feel happy that dose ran out, now i need something new in my routine cause I’m addicted to dopamine I want some recognition, a trophy just for living make me an app that moves the straw straight to my mouth I wanna watch one more season and take naps for no reason I want a golden goose and I want it right now earth and fire, wind and water, I want the heart cause my world needs a captain planet but I’m a hungry hungry hungry hippo, so feed me marbles ’til i choke I’m gonna scroll down just one more page I’m gonna turn off my phone just give me one more day at least I’m not on hard drugs as well I’m just addicted to everything else I’m feeling better, I’ll be okay, I’m just kidding, give me everything
2.
hey, I’m just trying to help, I think you've mistaken the snake that spirals up this rod, as the rattle that bit you cause you were knocked unconscious when my ambulance just hit you you’ve also lost a couple liters of blood next time I’ll drive more carefully, but luckily I’m first on scene and for you, I’ve got just what you need Pokémon band aids and flintstone vitamin c that’s all you'll need, for the venom and the trauma as you bleed at least I think it’s all you'll need I’m not giving up, even if you want me to and even if you punch and scream I’m going on and on ’til your heart starts to beat stop waving your arms you’re making this so much harder than it has to be a real doctor's not as good as me I’ve got so many lessons on how not to bleed your vitals are slowing, your eye's they are rolling well I know that's not my fault and for you I know I’ve got just what you need new hugs and varsity parenting that’s all you'll need, I’m the best paramedic you'll meet at least I think it's all you'll need hey just halt right there young man you can’t talk back and just go and die on me you did this to yourself, I was just trying to help ok I lost my cool today, I guess I’m not that great it’s time to just give up if only there was something bigger than us that won't give up I’m so small, I think I should give it up if only there was something bigger that could keep us up I’m so small, I think I should give it up if only there was love, bigger that could keep us up
3.
born a slave to die, Spartacus Kirk Douglas he’s got a sword by his side and his future’s looking a little brighter but roman reach divide, leader of men can you imagine the father he would have been? but they seized him and killed him before his child and I know the “how” and the “when” but the “why” I can’t seem to comprehend if I could just say I’m Spartacus, come off that cross, stay with us I keep asking, “are you satisfied?” if you’re not then, why’d he have to die? is it just for your complex story line? just tell me, why’d he have to die? back to modern times right now grandfather clock design, aural advice, I have relied on his chime but his chambers speak of spontaneous combustion and they blew up last night his heart - it quit beating - just stopped, expired time the weights are too heavy now, that was his job but he died and I know the “how” and the “when” but the “why” I can’t seem to comprehend his hands and face aren't moving, say something, anything hey, I know, what you’re feeling like but you don’t understand what I’m doing with your life are you not stronger now? what I did to him I did for….you but you’ll never know, cause it’s all about what’s best for you but you only feel what’s right in front of you, right now
4.
Adolf Hitler, he played call of duty on Friday nights when he lost at Nazi zombies, that made him rage quit his whole life and Genghis Khan, before he destroyed an entire population spent decades playing age of empires in his mother's basement Wikipedia and history books they got it wrong it was never about power or terror all along turn it off or else you'll end up the same that Mario, that Tetris will make you go insane video games they cause violence and fighting it's not because humans are sick and they're crying no it’s got to be the gaming, turn it off is what I’m saying i think we got to pause the gaming now Jeffrey Dahmer, he played mortal kombat at the arcade the way scorpion's spear penetrates Lui Kang felt way too great and Billy the Kid, his favorite console was the Xbox one before killing sheriffs he would turn it on to red dead redemption why are those birds so angry, why are you old birds always angry? I guess if you had fledglings that were violent too you'd want something to blame and someone to hang so slingshot at the pigs and blocks, your points will eventually come across but the chicks will fall right from the nest if they don't get warmth beneath your breast, find the scape goat, pull back and fire Eric Harris and Dylan shooting columbine they played doom and quake together in their spare time but there's something deeper, something more than simple games there was a chemical disease, illness in their brains Wikipedia and history books they got it right it was always about mental health and suicide and the irony is when you say games are the problem it makes me want to punch you in the throat even harder
5.
I’ve worked this mine going on centuries at least fighting orcs and dust, trolls and rust and every cavernous beast cause I’ve been searching for some precious gems so long I never knew, I had ‘em up above all along I’ve got the diamonds in the night sky and emeralds in your eyes I’ve got the gold of your hair these gems I’ll keep forever I’ve got the diamonds in the night sky the sapphire ocean tide the ruby beating in your chest these gems I’ll keep forever I’ve hunted dragons and it's always been the same one goes down then there's a bigger one to hunt in its place the treasure is nice but the feeling dies oh it dies so soon you've got perfect clarity cut and shape, that shape and clarity
6.
that planet is a scary place heffalumps and humans they await to break your spine and face, laugh as you fall captain, what should we do? two billion fathoms into space little men plot courses from their base keeping secret what they do (covert mission) an interstellar rendezvous with a stone gliding that sleeps in the void an innocuous body of an asteroid the stone has no plan to seek and destroy but they're gonna weaponize it, strap on rockets change its course and watch it collide that planet's gonna get what’s coming well they deserve it so I don’t even care at all look how they treat each other, all in the name of love well they deserve it so I don't even care at all look how they cheat each other, all in the name of love you know I almost had some pity, savage, their brains are too small but if they'd been more like us peaceful beings we wouldn’t have had to kill them all lie down, admire a heavenly body Virgo, she glistens from a crescent motel lamp in the breezeway, a foreign vibration Orion approaches with a gun and a simple plan gravitational love brings illegal intrigue through a heart with fatigue the stone in the chamber knows not what it does but it carries the burden of jealousy the portal opens, a flash from yonder lights the figure of Virgo her lover's grey matter all over the floor both stones impact and they bore through the cores that planet really got what’s coming we're just aliens, and we like to play with laser beams we're just aliens, and we like to feel supreme
7.
a little coffee and the smell of holiday cinnamon rolls the sofa's softer with a blanket and pillow and dog laugher bounced off the frames that hang on these four walls and we'd gather closer, light a fire, whenever we got cold but now it's so empty with change I used to think that this house seemed great, but… it's not home without you, it’s not home if you're not here when I wake up and I’m all alone, this place ain’t home you've had a long day and I strangely wanna hear you complain just to hear your voice, it makes me melt (ah) and drip away I could use some cold toes on my shin underneath the sheets you see, just to know you're there helps me forget about everything if we blast off to live on a star I know I’ll be warm cause home's where you are I wish you’d come back home
8.
I’ve got some beef with my neighbor building his new shed he blocked my view so naturally I wish that he was dead stop and go in this traffic, people make me insane at least when I get home I’ll sit, relax, and watch the game why did he pass it? there was only 1 minute left! and is this ref on the other team and both blind and deaf? I’m gonna lose it again some people say “won't you let it go?” “these inconsequential things you can't control" what they don’t know is if I keep on screaming I’ll convince myself things are fixin’ I’m howling for no good reason might be a full moon or just my feelings you might say I’ve got so much to live for but I can’t help feeling all the bad breaks and wrongs of the world can you believe what he posted on twittergram? and it's been raining since last Tuesday morning, 5am I was born about 34 years too late that’s why my moves and game are all worn out, no second date why won't she love me? I’m the nicest and humblest ignore the cabbage smell, fedoras should make you impressed they don’t know I exist some people say "won’t you let it go?” "all these things you totally can't control" I know there's cancer, and famine, and earthquakes if i get mad enough I’ll save myself from bad breaks why won't you shut up, you are so ungrateful how could you have it all but still sound so hateful? hey, Lou Gehrig, he always knew he had it taken all away but still felt gratitude some people say "won’t you let it go?” “all these things you totally can't control" if I keep screaming you know what will happen? yes, absolutely nothing I’m howling for no good reason, I’m just happy cause I’m still breathing you should say I’ve got so much to live for cause even with bad breaks I’m the luckiest man in the world

about

Indie Vision Music is proud to present the new album from Grandpa Loves Rhinos led by the new single, “Gimme, Gimme”. This diverse and eclectic set of songs found on the upcoming album, “Searching in The Sarchasm” (yes spelled like that on purpose), is something profoundly different yet falls in line with all the bands you love.

These are songs for everyone and songs you can’t help but appreciate. “Gimme, Gimme” is one of those perfect summer songs that’ll get you amped up for a day at the beach, lake, or maybe even gym. It’s got those addictive melodies, sing-a-long parts, and plenty of sly, witty sarcasm to make you stop and think.
The rest of the songs found on this new album are nothing short of extraordinary from a band you’ve probably never heard but see the name and go, “well that’s different”. Songs like “Fostering Patience for Patients” (Featuring Andrew Alojipan of Kept On Hold), and “Why’d He Have To Die” (Featuring Jake Olexyn of The Burden) show that this band isn’t afraid to collaborate and feature rising talent to enhance the sound of their songs, pushing them in new and exciting directions. The song “It’s Gotta Be The Gaming” is one you don’t want to miss. It has a profound message stretched across the upbeat song showing people that mental health issues are very real, and that you can’t always shift blame to other objects like gaming just because the masses and perpetrators happen to have that in common. We live in a lost broken, hurting world in need of love. Gaming is not the problem; hurting, pain, mental illness, and suicide certainly is.

Grandpa Loves Rhinos tip their hat proudly at nostalgia, at things many of us cling to. In that tongue in cheek humor, the sarcasm, and the references, is a story about our human nature. Our quest to find hope in a world searching for meaning. We are all just hanging on, clinging to a life that once meant so much. In the anxiety about tomorrow, we turn to music to ease our suffering. Music from Grandpa Loves Rhinos does just that and so much more. Give this fun band with a unique name a listen and leave your troubles behind. Sit back, relax, and strap on for the ride because this summer won’t be a summer without Grandpa Loves Rhinos. – Brandon Jones/IVM

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released August 7, 2020

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Grandpa Loves Rhinos Idaho

Brotherly duo Paul (drums) and Seth (guitar/bass/vocals) Hyde, and their jobs in the Air Force have forced them to live hundreds of miles away from each other, separated by mountains, valleys, and creatures of the deep. Although distance plagues Grandpa Loves Rhinos, their desire to create music burns eternal--GLR creates music in correspondence of a blend of modern rock, pop punk, and emo. ... more

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